Comments on: When to Say Yes, How to Say No

By: Anny

Anny — Sun, 10 Jul 2016 17:17:07 +0000

In reply to Vicki. Vicky, definitely, I think it's a typo, #3 should be unlikely, as in now or who knows when :-)

By: mimi

mimi — Mon, 16 May 2016 13:03:58 +0000

AGAIN perfection Stephen
xxx

By: Maggie

Maggie — Fri, 13 May 2016 21:57:35 +0000

Stephen, thank you so much for writing this entry!! As someone who is working on her PhD, I am in what feels like a constant, Sysiphean battle with having enough time. Your words about the junk vs. meaning dichotomy are very encouraging and I absolutely will keep them in mind as encouragement. I have gotten better about taking advantage of the meaningful opportunities, but some how am having trouble escaping the junk. So, thank you! I think your words were EXACTLY what I needed to read to get to a place of increased productivity AND happiness!

Thanks for making my day!

ps. Jesuits aren’t a monastic order ;)

By: Vicki

Vicki — Fri, 13 May 2016 21:39:15 +0000

I wonder if #3 should be “unlikely” to happen again soon implying that this is a precious moment that won’t happen so you should go do it.

By: Emily

Emily — Mon, 09 May 2016 00:25:21 +0000

Um, #1 is an either-or question so you’re gonna say “yes” to it, probably.

A tip I learned from a book on Procrastination is to plan your fun first. Sounds counter-intuitive (and sometimes we all need to be spontaneous) but when we PLAN space for fun, we’re usually more focused in our time for work. Rather than turning down invites because we gotta “write that book” or whatever project we’re letting consume us and end up procrastinating on with the mindless activity because we never gave ourselves a real break.

By: Amy

Amy — Mon, 09 May 2016 00:18:18 +0000

In reply to Gordana. Doesn't mean that it is trash with no meaning, it just means that making room for a beer crawl in the middle of the week with your regular drinking buddy could be scheduled for the week after you are done with your deadline..

By: Amy

Amy — Mon, 09 May 2016 00:12:07 +0000

I went abroad myself lately, and went to 3 different places where I used to live. I have friends and family all places, but I was only gonna stay a few days at each place.

Beforehand I didn’t mention to a lot of people I was going to all of the places, and I only took contact with the people I really wanted to meet the same day I went there. I didn’t want to plan too much beforehand, and rather just see who would have time to catch up, and just take it from there. I ended up meeting almost everyone I wanted to meet, and had a really fun and spontaneous trip. For some reason I thought people might be angry/disappointed for me not letting them know sooner, but it seemed that also my friends was happy that I wanted to fill them in on my short time in each place.

I think it is important to use your time wisely, and on the people you truly love and care for. For example I didn’t want to post in my newsfeed on FB where I was going, or when I was going to be there, because I didn’t want people I really didn’t want to meet to get in touch with me, and thus feel obligated to use time on them rather than the ones I really wanted to meet.

By: Mona

Mona — Sun, 08 May 2016 06:18:45 +0000

Stephen, thank you!!! I just screwed up a relationship in the past by doing what you warn against here! Thanks for this and putting it so beautifully. Will not be a mistake I will repeat again!

By: Gordana

Gordana — Sun, 08 May 2016 04:04:10 +0000

Well I don’t understand the logic of the third question “Is it likely to happen again anytime soon?” If you answer this question with “yes”, this contribites to the fact, that it’s trash and not meaning. Why should you shift your schedule and sacrifice your progress for something you might do as well one week later?

By: Sydney

Sydney — Sat, 07 May 2016 07:58:22 +0000

In reply to Sydney. Means good content and great structuring overall of presenting that content!