Comments on: 4 Questions To Ask Yourself BEFORE You Decide He’s “The One”

By: Claire

Claire — Mon, 29 Jan 2024 10:49:55 +0000

I think a lot is about compromise. There will always have to be some and knowing what you’re prepared to compromise on and what feels too much. I also think there has to be some mention of fun. You have to have fun together, an element of silliness amongst the battles of life. I spent 17 years with a man I thought was my soul mate who was actually abusive and now I believe in two people who want to make it work enough to sometimes put the other person first but ultimately still allow each other to be themselves and not want to change that person.

By: Tiffany Childers

Tiffany Childers — Mon, 28 Aug 2023 04:38:43 +0000

Your comment on how it’s more romantic to ‘choose’ the person rather than pre-determined luck made me think of the Netflix movie Love In The Villa. I just watched it earlier and the character Charlie said the exact same thing. I have to say, I don’t agree. I believe God made someone for all of us. While we can choose who we want, because of free will, it might not necessarily be ‘The One’. I feel that everyone has a soul mate, but not everyone will find them.

By: H.A

H.A — Sun, 27 Aug 2023 15:34:30 +0000

Very thoughtfully written and so easy to read and follow. I have much to think about Thank you

By: Alice

Alice — Fri, 16 Oct 2020 04:24:27 +0000

I learn a lot about you program

By: Melinda Fehervari

Melinda Fehervari — Thu, 15 Oct 2020 16:11:30 +0000

Oh my God!!! I love everything you and brother come up with!! I wish I had half of this relationships intelligence at your age or access to a book or blogs as it is today... it could have had spare me a lot of drama ‍ bad experiences a divorce and lots of insecurities I hope many young women follow your advice, for their sake...really. For sure I’ll hand my book (author: Hussey) over to my granddaughter ( in case my daughter doesn’t do it first) which I had great joy to read through and open hearted recommend. Great job ! Always glad and keen to hearing from you two

By: Candace

Candace — Thu, 15 Oct 2020 12:34:12 +0000

Thanks so much for this! So very true, Every last one. Some people come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

By: Plami

Plami — Thu, 15 Oct 2020 09:35:08 +0000

Stephen I remember one of your lives on IG, where you answered my question : “How to know whether he is the right one for me?” And back then you answered me with the exact same answers- short and clear. I will never forget it. The information in this blog post is very valuable and is remaining in my mind like an arrow which shows the right path. So everytime I meet someone I have this in mind.
I would add to your question, that what would makes me decide if the guy is the one is- the energy, the level of kindness and if he makes me feel secure and loved enough and he is proven it over time.
You know female nature.. we are always seeking stability and security..:)

Have a wonderful Thursday,
Plami xxx

By: Sanya

Sanya — Thu, 05 Mar 2020 15:36:59 +0000

Love language plays a crucial role as well. As Stephen pointed out in point number 2, communication through similar methods to some extent helps a lot. If one partner is expressive and the other person does not express at all, this can become a problem in long run unless their communication game is strong.

Previously, I was in a relationship where I felt it was always one sided and when it broke off after 3yrs, I was devastated. But then I discovered Matt and Stephen, and since then I am doing great. My life has taken a 360 turn. I am able to identify the red flags quicker and leave before things get messy.

By: Kristyn

Kristyn — Thu, 05 Mar 2020 12:11:53 +0000

I loved this article and definitely agree about the chemistry and having similar values that you can build on over time. I’ve had 2 relationships one for 18 months and one for 18 years. One was a cereal cheater, the other a narcissist so for me I feel the following is really important:
Are you both prepared to walk in with a clean slate??? Yes your last relationship may have ended badly or his previous girlfriend never valued his opinions but you didn’t do that to each other so you can’t go into the next relationship already holding a grudge. A new relationship allows you to wipe that relationship slate totally clean. Yes mistakes are going to be made because no relationship is perfect but they are new mistakes with a new partner and should be treated as such. If you can’t find it in yourself to wipe the slate clean then you need to focus on your relationship with yourself first so you can let the past go so it does not ruin your future otherwise that slate will be full of triggers and negativity before you know it and it is not fair on either of you to pay for other people’s past transgressions.

By: Holly

Holly — Fri, 28 Feb 2020 18:45:25 +0000

I think it’s important to have dwal-breakers and must-haves (like being kind, responsible with money, etc) and the ither and physical things can be more open-ended. I want a smart guy, preferably someone with a college degree, but it’s not a requirement. My filter process helps weed out men that will never have a chance with me but it’s not so rigid that no one can meet the requirements.