Comments on: 3 Simple Steps to Handle Being “Gaslighted” https://matthewhussey.com/blog/three-simple-steps-to-handle-being-gaslighted/ Have The Love Life You Want Sun, 13 Sep 2020 21:06:57 +0000 hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.6.1 By: Keep smilin https://matthewhussey.com/blog/three-simple-steps-to-handle-being-gaslighted/#comment-1024392 Sun, 13 Sep 2020 21:06:57 +0000 https://matthewhussey.com/?p=24221#comment-1024392 The last guy I dated did this to me, he was extremely jealous of my male friends to the point that it became quite abusive, even though I told him numerous times they are just friends who I’ve known for years, many of which have partners or are married with families. He ended up cheating on me while still living with me, because he thought he was perfectly justified to do so as he believed I was cheating. Then the lies started where he twisted the truth so much that I didn’t even know what to believe anymore. I felt so degraded and belittled and even compared to someone else, like I was never good enough, even though he swore to me no one else was involved. Eventually all the lies and games all got too much for me so I packed his bags & kicked him out when he didn’t come home one night. I then found out he was cheating all along. It all hurt me so badly as I trusted him & never thought he would do this & thought he was a better person than that. And instead of talking to me directly, he would often drop hints or say things referring to third parties when what he was doing was actually referring to our relationship & the other woman he was seeing. This is a 44 year old man that couldn’t even have an adult conversation about our relationship. Now I’m out of this relationship and can see it for exactly what it was, but it was still exceptionally hurtful. And yes, he livebombed me at the start. I still have trouble understanding what exactly happened. I contacted the woman he was cheating on me with and even though she knows the truth, as I gave her evidence that he was seeing the both of us at the same time, he obviously has manipulated her with his lies, as she is still with him. I attempted to warn her of what he is like but she obviously believes his lies & no doubt he’s misrepresented me to her, telling her that I cheated etc, when none of it is true. The weirdest thing was he unblocked me on Facebook so then i could see pictures of them together. I’ve since blocked all contact with him as I just now want to put it all behind me & move on. I swear it was the most hurtful & strangest thing anyone has ever put me through and I guess I will never really understand any of it, as it was all just based on massive insecurities & lies.

]]> By: Bailey https://matthewhussey.com/blog/three-simple-steps-to-handle-being-gaslighted/#comment-1024255 Sun, 13 Sep 2020 15:47:54 +0000 https://matthewhussey.com/?p=24221#comment-1024255 Thanks for the post Matthew on gaslighting. It really brought to light a lot of things in my relationship, especially in regards to how my partner and I communicate that I wasn’t even aware of. I guess my bigger question now is how to bring up to your partner if you think they are gaslighting? Should you even bring it up? How do you work through that or is it worth working through? Looking forward to the rest of this series.

]]> By: Zita https://matthewhussey.com/blog/three-simple-steps-to-handle-being-gaslighted/#comment-1024161 Sat, 12 Sep 2020 20:44:39 +0000 https://matthewhussey.com/?p=24221#comment-1024161 Ditto for discussing love-bombing and how to deal w/this person if you really like them.

this happened to me for the 1st time in my life earlier this year (I’m 46) and I drank it up … all the lovely compliments and the sweet pet names. Only to realize a few months later that they were just words coming out the mouth of a very insecure man who was probably copying & pasting this from some guy-centered dating advice website.

*sigh*

then he broke up w/me + it hurt like he’ll mostly because I missed that (fake) love-bombing action.

I want to find better ways of recognizing this before it’s too late.

]]> By: Hayley Woodgate https://matthewhussey.com/blog/three-simple-steps-to-handle-being-gaslighted/#comment-1024052 Sat, 12 Sep 2020 12:49:36 +0000 https://matthewhussey.com/?p=24221#comment-1024052 I can’t thank you enough for this, you helped me in a timely need of it most, I feared my book coming out The truth of trauma cause of gaslighting cause I doubted the truth within it but now I know I can bare my truth without being scared of it in knowing what they did to plant the doubt in me

Thank you Mathew, I really appreciate this and because I’m f this thousands can be helped within it.

]]> By: Johanna https://matthewhussey.com/blog/three-simple-steps-to-handle-being-gaslighted/#comment-1024047 Sat, 12 Sep 2020 12:28:21 +0000 https://matthewhussey.com/?p=24221#comment-1024047 Thank you very-very much for this! I’m glad you’re discussing the elements of an abusive relationships (such as lovebombing, gaslighting, and I hope there will be a video on how to tell the difference between hoovering and coming back for good).

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